Monthly Musings | Hello, June

I’m actually pretty excited for summer to be here.

I know – who am I?

After spending my first summer as a mom last year, I realized that summer can be fun. OK, maybe not realized, but remembered. I’m looking forward to seeing another summer through my little girl’s eyes. She’s starting to take little steps here and there, so I see a lot of chasing in the sunshine this season 🙂

May was an odd month. I was sick pretty much the entire month. I wasn’t feeling 100% in Atlanta, but then I came back and got more sick, then Nora got sick after starting at a new daycare, then we got sick after that and then sick AGAIN a week later … I had to cancel my work trip and miss a first birthday party AND a bridal shower. Quite the bummer.

What I did enjoy about May was that I started writing and publishing my own poetry. I never really dabbled in that art form before, and I’m happy to share I found a new creative outlet. I’ve written about 50 poems, and I’m getting ready to publish my first collection about postpartum and my first year as a mama. Exciting stuff.

And, because I was writing so much poetry, I only read one book in May, and it was Empire of Gold! I finally finished the Daevabad trilogy! Review to come.

What I’m up to this month

I’m actually headed to D.C. the first week of June for a work conference, then to Virginia for a work event. Then, just friends’ parties and book clubs, and having a fun month with my babe! Ian’s birthday is this month, and Father’s Day, so lots to celebrate.

Podcast update

Well, it’s been a slow start. I have the name (We’re Talkin’ Postpartum), now I just need to make the time to write the introduction episode, record and publish that, and schedule interviews. It’s ironic; I am rolling out a podcast about being a mom and I can’t get it started because I am busy … being a mom! It will happen soon.

What I’m reading in June (all the genres! all at once!)

  • Devotions: Poems by Mary Oliver
  • Happy Place by Emily Oliver
  • Homecoming by Kate Morton
  • Yellowface by R.F. Kuang
  • Look Closer by David Ellis
  • Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarrow

What I’m Watching

  • You
  • The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel

What I’m Listening To

  • The Album – Jonas Brothers
  • FLETCHER
  • Sabrina Carpenter
  • Carole King

chaos than quiet

my mind doesn’t rest.

snow flurries of thoughts

and worries

accumulating

even when i ask them to go

away

i think of heartache

of death

of what ifs

or could-bes.

i think

i think

i think

i think

and sometimes

i wish

i wish

i wish

for a world where i don’t feel all of this.

for a quiet mind.

but what if it’s too quiet?

would i miss the loud?

and what about the artists? the poets?

how would i create?

art is chaos in a simpler form

and i’d rather have chaos than quiet.

lilac whispers

when i need a minute to clear

my head

i go to my lilac tree

with its deep purple blooms

vibrant against the overcast

sky

and its mighty branches

swaying tall in the breeze

the flowers brushing shoulders

as if they’re in on their own

little secret.

is the secret that

even on days when all seems unbearable

unreasonable

unmanageable

beauty still exists?

tucked away

in my front yard

waiting for the right ears

to come along

lean in

and hear their whispers?

something about soil

there’s just something about soil

that makes me plunge my arms right in

straight to my elbows

my fingers tickling worms

brushing roots

thumbing over stones

the warm sun on the back of my neck.

but my arms are cold

from the earth’s caress

its steady embrace

as i turn old into new

and wait for the seeds to bloom.